morning

Got out to my car and the sprinklers were on, spraying all over the driver’s side door, leaving me no option but to hurdle over the passenger seat. Just as I settled in the sprinklers shut off and the sprinkler guy testing them walked by. Then I get to school, head to the bathroom b/f class. After washing my hands I realize that the paper towel dispenser is empty forcing an air dry on the way to class. Other dispensers in the building are also empty. Very frustrating for the consummate hand washer.

no wonder

I bought the nifty sandwich container shown at left. I had seen it around the lunch room and besides the fact that it raised the brownbag sandwich eater’s status (if that’s possible) compared to the average zip-lock user it is presumably more economical and “green” but most importantly, and the reason for my purchase, was that I could throw my sandwich in it without worry of it falling prey (getting smashed) in the bag and community work/school fridge.

One big freakin problem however, a design flaw out of touch with modern day consumers – modern day fat over eating American consumers. I made my usual sandwich with enough meat, cheese, et cetera to sustain me until my next meal. I felt all special getting to use my new hip sandwich container until I actually tried to fit my sandwich in it. No way was it freakin fitting. I was running late so I figured I’ll just smash the lid on, right? Nope, the lid doesn’t fit tight enough and just pops off from the pressure of my strong ass 100% whole wheat bread pushing up on it. Back to baggies.

Two pieces of bread alone barely fit in it. It is more of a bread carrier than a sandwich container. The only wich that would pry be ok is PB&J, and who really cares about protecting their PB&J anyway.

Fat Farter

Went to the Olive Garden last night to find that they replaced my preferred menu item with a less than preferable dish. We were sat next to a table containing a rather fat round woman and her lovely husband. They had just finished their feast and were waiting for their check.

So, I’m sitting there eating my replacement dish and I look over at the rather fat lady. Right at that moment, I see her back fat and large ass ripple as he let out a huge fart. The fart waves bounced off her vinyl seat cushion (you could see the vibration) and resonated throughout the room, clearly audible to the 30 + folks enjoying their meals around her.

So what is the fat farter’s reaction you must wonder? Well she says to her lover:

“That was a loud one” (sounding almost proud)

They then got up and rolled out just as her fart particles were surely settling in my shrimp pasta. It was a different dish indeed.

Had I been in a little intoxicated of state I damn sure would have stated loudly in the Fat Farter’s direction: “what the fuck was that?!” Laughing unabashedly was substituted.

conflicted

Law Dems First Meeting – 12:00 p.m.-1:00 p.m.

Federalist Society Informational Luncheon - 12:00 p.m.-12:50 p.m

Boy, you’d think these two orgs would get together so that their meeting times didn’t make one choose which to attend. So torn. I’m guessing the Dems will have better food with the Federalists providing only what would have been available in 1789.

speaking of the Broncos game…

I must bring up a thought had at the time. When the clock was running down the Broncos threw a pass for the 1st down, caught and in bounds. They rushed to the line only to have Cutler take a knee and down the ball which wasted a play and kepp the clock running forcing the Broncos to waste their last timeout, one that would have been nice to have to set up the field goal. My thought was WTF? Why not spike the ball and stop the clock? Was it a mistake? Why the hell would you take a knee??? You take a knee to run out the clock!! Had to be a rookie error.

So they wasted their timeout and then ran a running play for about 5 or so yards which left the clock running as the field goal unit rushed to the field to get the kick off with seconds expiring. If you don’t have a timeout and there are only 20 or so seconds left and they run it up the middle? Sure probably to set it up on the preferred kicking hash mark but at that point the Broncos didn’t have such a luxury. They should have done a short past to the sidelines with an incomplete or out of bounds to stop the clock. Or just kicked the field goal.

Cutler is obviously no Elway with his last minute drive but he did get the job done which is why nobody really cares or is talking about this last minute game management.

NFL opening day afternoon games competitive

Bronco’s won today in a hellava finish. I thought for sure they would run out of time b/f the field goal unit could get out and get th kick off, but never fear Elam showed why he is still one of the best kickers in the league. In almost an identical finish the Packers won making it a good start for Farve’s probably last season and former Husker Brandon Jackson. I’m Happy for Jackson who’s quality talent was somewhat written off by the Husker coaches.

On a less happy note, the Dolphins couldn’t pull it off in overtime against the Redskins. Damnit. The team and personal has gone through so much that everything is still a little fucked up. Marino showed at the Hall Of Fame introduction that he still has an arm. I say, wishfully, that we bring him back with a good line and all he has to do is stand there and throw. In fact I say we make him a player-coach.

intro

NB: this is a personal blog reflecting on the realities and occurrences in life. Critical, cynical, yet realistic analysis is expected. enjoy.